Another School Play
by MDT
Summary: Helga and Arnold are casted together in the school's production of Our Town but tensions are flaring between them. Will Helga confess? .. ... .. .. Ye-maybe. R&R to find out!


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MDT's "Hey Arnold!" Fan Fiction

"Another School Play"

By Shaun Blankenship

SCENE: _Mr. Simmons is settling the class down to get their attention._

SIMMONS: Now children, I have a very special message for all of you. Due to the success of our production of "_Romeo and Juliet_", the school is allowing us to perform another play this year. For the play, I've chosen Thornton Wilder's classic "_Our Town_".

GERALD: "Our Town"?

STINKY: What the heck is "Our Town"?

SIMMONS: "Our Town" is a story about a small town in New Hampshire named Grover's Corners. In it…

SID: Are there gonna be any sword fights like in "Romeo and Juliet"?

SIMMONS: No, Sid, there won't be ant fights. "Our Town" is a simple play about life in a rural country town being overcome by modernism.

STINKY: Oh, it's one of _those_ types of plays.

SIMMONS: Yes. It's rumored that the play was based on Thornton Wilder's grandmother's town of Romeo, Michigan. It's the author's most popular play to date.

HELGA: Wait a minute, if it's so popular, how come _we've_ never heard about it? I mean, everybody _knows_ "Romeo and Juliet", but who the heck's ever even heard of "Our Town"?

SIMMONS: Helga, let's not worry about that. Auditions begin today after school in the auditorium. I am passing around a sheet with the names of all the characters and their descriptions. I want all of you to take a look at the sheet and see if there's anything you like. [He passes out the sheet.]

GERALD: [Reading.] 'Stage Manager.' Hmm, that sounds easy. All this guy does is narrate the beginning of the acts!

SIMMONS: Actually, the Stage Manager has a lot of lines. Many of which are spoken at great lengths. Anyone who chooses to be the Stage Manager must also remember that a great deal of responsibility comes with the role. [Paper is still being passed around.]

HELGA: Well, this time I am _not_ signing up for this stupid play.

ARNOLD: Hmm, George Gibbs doesn't sound that bad.

SIMMONS: Oh, George Gibbs is one of the main characters in the play! And when him and Emily get married…

HAROLD: Another love story! Aw! How many love stories to we have to do at this school?

SIMMONS: Now calm down, Harold. George and Emily aren't married until the second act and that's pretty much the only romantic part of the play.

STINKY: It still sounds like another dumb ol' love story.

ARNOLD: I think I might audition for George.

GERALD: That's not fair, Arnold. Last year you were Romeo, and now you're gonna take the lead role in _this_ play also. Give someone else a chance.

HELGA: Hmm, George marries Emily… [Thinks to herself and looks at Phoebe. Phoebe is looking at her with a semi-confused look on her face. She snaps back to reality.] No, I'm not auditioning. No way, no how. Besides, it's just a small roll. Why should I care that I'd be married to Arnold for half of the play?

LILA: Hmm, Emily Webb sounds just ever so pleasant. I think I'll sign up for her.

HELGA: [Gets a very disgruntled look on her face and speaks with her teeth clenched.] I'm auditioning...

SCENE: _The auditorium after school. Mr. Simmons is holding auditions. Auditions in the auditorium… COINCIDENCE?_

STINKY: [Reading for Dr. Gibbs.] 'Julia, do you know one of the things I was scared of when I married you?'

RHONDA: [Reading for Mrs. Gibbs.] 'Oh, go along with you!'

STINKY: 'I was afraid we wouldn't have material for conversation more'n'd last us a few weeks.' [Actually reads the stage movement on the script.] 'Both laugh.' Mr. Simmons, this play sounds like it really bites.

SIMMONS: Well, thank you for your special perspective on the play so far. Trust me, if you stay with it you won't regret it.

STINKY: Fine, I'll play along, but it ain't my fault if the show bites on account of it did before I joined in. [Cuts to Gerald's audition.]

GERALD: [Reading for Stage Manager very dramatically.] 'See what I mean? So, people a thousand years from now, this is the way we were in the provinces north of New York at the beginning of the twentieth century. This is the way we were: in our growing up and in our marrying and in our living and in our dying.'

SIMMONS: [Clapping.] That was great, Gerald. I think you're our new Stage Manager. Just some advice for next time, try to be more laid back. This isn't Shakespeare; it's New Hampshire.

GERALD: Got 'cha, Mr. S. [Cuts to Harold's audition.]

HAROLD: [Reading for Mr. Webb.] 'Well, ma'am, there ain't much, not in the sense you mean. Come to think of it, there's some girls that play the piano at High School Com… Commen…' Oh, I can't read this! It's too hard, Mr. Simmons!

SIMMONS: C'mon, Harold, it's 'Commencement.' It may look hard, but it's really easy.

HAROLD: Yeah, but what about the word after that?

SIMMONS: [Looking at the script.] You mean 'but'?

HAROLD: Oh, so _that's_ how you spell it… [Cuts to Arnold's audition.]

ARNOLD: [Reading for George Gibbs.] 'Gosh, if anything like that can happen I don't want to go away. I guess new people aren't any better than old ones. I'll bet they almost never are. Emily… I feel you're as good a friend as I got. I don't need to go and meet people in other towns.'

LILA: [Reading for Emily Webb.] 'But, George, maybe it's very important for you to go and learn all that about – cattle judging and soils and those things… Of course, I don't know.'

ARNOLD: 'Emily, I'm going to make up my mind right now. I won't go. I'll tell Pa about it tonight.'

SIMMONS: That was excellent, Arnold. It looks like you may once again headline the play this year. Sorry, Eugene.

EUGENE: [On the side with crutches.] Oh, I just fell of the stage four times. I'll be fine come performance time! [One of the crutches breaks; Eugene falls and throws the other crutch up in the air.] I'm okay. [Is hit on the head with the other crutch that was in the air and is knocked unconscious. Cuts to Sheena's Audition.]

SHEENA: [Also reading for Emily Webb. Many other girls are auditioning for Emily so any one after her up to Mr. Simmons is auditioning for Emily.] 'I always expect a man to be perfect and I think he should be. My father is, and as far as I can see…'

PATTY: '…_your_ father is. There's no reason on earth that you shouldn't be, too.'

HELGA: [Reading very seriously as if confessing about Arnold.] 'Well, you might as well know right now that I'm not perfect. It's not as easy for a girl to be perfect as a man, because we girls are more – more – nervous. – Now I'm sorry I said all that about you. I don't know what made me say it. [Simmons is teary-eyed.] Now I can see it's not the truth at all. And I suddenly feel…'

SIMMONS: Helga, that was the best I've seen today! You have to take this part, Helga. You absolutely _have_ to.

HELGA: Yeah, yeah, fine Simmons. I'll be in your cheesy little play.

SIMMONS: Great, practices start Monday. I expect to see you after school then.

HELGA: Whatever. I'm goin' home. [Walks backstage into a corner of the curtain.] Yes! For a repeat engagement, Arnold and I will share the stage in a loving embrace! It's been destined! Oh, fate of fates, a few weeks from today and I will have Arnold as putty in my hands again! Of course, we'll both be acting like we always do, but maybe this time it'll advance me closer to his football-headed heart! Oh, Arnold! Arnold!

ARNOLD: [Walks up to the curtain.] Helga!

HELGA: [Give a blood-curdling scream.] Arnold!

ARNOLD: I thought I heard you say my name.

HELGA: Um…uh…yeah! We're in the play together.

ARNOLD: _You_ got the part of Emily?!

HELGA: That's right, bucko! See you in the funny papers. [Walks out. Gerald walks up to Arnold.]

GERALD: Helga's gonna be your wife in the play?

ARNOLD: You know, it's almost as if she keeps trying to be with me in these plays.

GERALD: [Both thinking about it.] Nah, she must just want the role.

ARNOLD: Maybe you're right.

SIMMONS: [Back in the front of the auditorium.] Alright, that's all the auditions. [Silence.] I said that's _all_ of the auditions. [Still silence.] I will be seeing no further people today. [Silence.] Hmm, maybe he didn't come this time…

SCENE: _In the hallway of P.S. 118 over at the bulletin board. Many kids are looking at the list._

LILA: I got the part of Rebecca! I'm just oh so sure I'll do a great job.

HAROLD: I'm playing the… uh… Be… Bell…

PHOEBE: Belligerent.

HAROLD: Oh, okay. Belligerent Man. What does 'belligerent' mean?

PHOEBE: Belligerent means that you are very prone to starting arguments.

HAROLD: Hey, I am not!

GEARLD: Yes, I am the Stage Manager!

ARNOLD: Good for you Gerald.

GERALD: Well, we're both in the play.

ARNOLD: Our entire class is in the play. Mr. Simmons needed people, and a lot of them lucked out last year and are trying to make it up. Some of them are doing dual shifts, being stagehands and also extra characters at the same time.

GERALD: Man, that is too much responsibility. I feel sorry for _those_ kids.

EUGENE: I'm a baseball player! Finally a part in the play! [Part of the ceiling falls down and hits him in the head.] I'm okay.

RHONDA: _I'm_ playing Mrs. Gibbs.

NADINE: Aw, I wanted to be her!

RHONDA: _You'll _do what I tell you do to!

NADINE: Yes, Rhonda.

RHONDA: Now, stay quiet.

PEAPOD: Interesting… I'm playing Howie Newsome. It will be my honor.

CURLY: Simons Stimson! Simon Stimson! Simmons has me playing a drunken organist at a church! All right! Right now I'm an extra, tomorrow I'll own them all! HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA…

GERALD: That kid has some major issues.

ARNOLD: Tell me about it.

SCENE: _Helga's house in the attic above her closet as seen in the movie. Yeah, I finally saw it! Finally cogflammit!_

HELGA: [Reading her lines to her Arnold shrine. She has a speak-n-spell sort of toy under the shrine.] 'Well… I was really ready to make a speech about the Monroe Doctrine, but at the last minute Miss Corcoran made me talk about the Louisiana Purchase instead. I worked an awful long time on both of them.'

TOY: [Her speak-n-spell like toy is reading Arnold's lines. The voice sounds very mechanical.] 'Gee, it's funny, Emily. From my window up there I can just see your head nights when you're doing your homework over in your room.'

HELGA: 'Why, can you?'

TOY: 'You certainly do stick to it, Emily, I don't see how you can sit still that long. I guess you like school.'

HELGA: [Talking over the toy's mechanical voice somewhere during 'I don't see…'] Oh, Arnold. Soon your lips shall speak the words I type in this cheap kindergarten plaything. Soon we will be bound in matrimony on stage, due to the words that are written on the page. For loneliness my heart will not miss, when we are seen on stage in embrace of a kiss! Oh, Arnold! My pulchritudinous love affection! I count the days until we are acting together…

SCENE: _Monday at play practice. Here's how this scene goes: Gerald's reading Stage Manager, Sid is Professor Willard, Phoebe is Mrs. Webb. I know nobody reading this cares, but maybe this story will inspire you to read the actual play. This isn't made up._

SID: '…Migration toward the end of the seventeenth century of English brachiocephalic blue-eyed stock… for the most part. Since then some Slav and Mediterranean – '

GERALD: 'And the population, Professor Willard?'

SID: 'Within the town limits: 2,640.

GERALD: 'Just a moment, Professor. [Whispers in Sid's ear.]'

SID: 'Oh, yes, indeed? – The population, _at the moment_, is 2,642. The Postal District brings in 507 more, making a total of 3, 149. – Mortality and birth rates: constant. – By MacPherson's gauge: 6.032.' Mr. Simmons, this play has a lot of hard words in it. Do you really think a fourth grade class should be doing it?

SIMMONS: Oh, yes! I know that all of you can do this. You're all very special and I'm confident that you'll all be able to perform this play without one flaw.

SID: [Confused.] I didn't say that we won't be able to do it, I meant this sounds like something for high school or college. We're only fourth graders. I don't think any of us know exactly what we're talking about.

SIMMONS: Well, however true that is, I'm sure all of you will be just fine. No go on.

GERALD: 'Thank you very much, Professor. We're all very much obliged to you, I'm sure.'

SID: 'Not at all, sir; not at all.'

GERALD: 'This way, Professor, and thank you again.' [Sid leaves the stage.] Now the political and social report: Editor Webb. – Oh, Mr. Webb?' [Phoebe appears on stage.]

PHOEBE: 'He'll be here in a minute… He just cut his hand while he was eatin' an apple.'

GERALD: 'Thank you, Mrs. Webb.'

PHOEBE: 'Charles! Everybody's waitin'.'

GERALD: I'm sorry, Mr. Simmons, but I have to stop today. Can we do another scene? All I'm doing is saying 'thank you' and 'here's Mr. So-and-so.' This is so boring!

SIMMONS: The beginning of 'Our Town' does move slowly, but it does have some significance as it moves along.

GERALD: I've looked throughout this whole book, this _is_ all the play is. Just small talk. Why are we doing this play?

SIMMONS: Please, children, I know this play is dull and boring to you at the moment, but trust me. Stay in the play, it'll be all worth while. But if you want, we can change scenes.

GERALD: Please!

SIMMONS: Alright, I'll need Arnold and Helga on stage and George and Emily. We'll do page 61.

ARNOLD: [Walks on stage with Helga.] 'Can I carry your books homes for you, Emily?'

HELGA: 'Why… uh… Thank you. It isn't far.'

ARNOLD: [Starts saying his lines but Helga is thinking to herself over his talking.] 'Excuse me a minute, Emily. – Say, Bob, if I'm a little late, start practice anyway. And give Herb some long high ones.'

HELGA: [Thinking.] _Oh, Arnold. Carrying my books, if only you'd do this in real life. Oh, Arnold…_

SIMMONS: Helga, your line…

HELGA: [Thinking.] _Oh, Arnold…_

ARNOLD: Helga?

HELGA: [Still out of it.] Yes, my love…

ARNOLD: Um, that's not your line, Helga.

HELGA: [Gets a grip.] Oh, I'm sorry. 'Good-by, Lizzy.'

ARNOLD: 'Good-by, Lizzy. – I'm awfully glad you were elected, too, Emily.'

HELGA: 'Thank you.'

ARNOLD: 'Emily, why are you mad at me?'

HELGA: 'I'm not mad at you.'

ARNOLD: 'You've been treating me so funny lately.'

HELGA: 'Well, since you ask me, I might as well say it right now, George, – Good-by, Miss Corcoran.'

ARNOLD: 'Good-by, Miss Corcoran. – What is it?'

HELGA: 'I don't like the whole change that's come over you in the last year. I'm sorry if that hurts your feelings, but I've got to – tell the truth and shame the devil.'

ARNOLD: '_A change?_ – What do you mean?'

HELGA: 'Well, up to a year ago I used to like you a lot. And I used to watch you as you did everything… because we'd been friends so long… and then you begin spending all your time at _baseball_… and you never stopped to speak to anybody any more. Not even to your own family you didn't… and, George, it's a fact, you've got awful conceited and stuck-up, and all the girls say so…' [The lights in the auditorium go out.] Hey, what's goin' on?

SIMMONS: It appears that the power has gone out for some reason, I'm sure it'll be fixed. [The lights go back on. A janitor is by the door of the auditorium.]

JANITOR: Hey, school's closed, go home!

SIMMONS: You heard him, everybody. Let's call it a day, I'll see all of you tomorrow.

ARNOLD: So, Helga, what do you think of the play?

HELGA: I can't wait until we perform it. Then I won't ever have to hear these _stupid words ever again!_ If I have to read this book one more time, I'll…

ARNOLD: Whoa, calm down. Hey, you wanna get together and practice our lines?

HELGA: [Is shocked and faints on the floor.]

ARNOLD: Helga? Helga! [Shaking her.] Helga, are you alright?

HELGA: Yes… ice cream…

ARNOLD: What?

HELGA: [Gets up.] Um, nothing! Yeah, sure, when do you want to get together to… uh…

ARNOLD: Read our lines?

HELGA: Yeah, that's it!

ARNOLD: Alright, how about Wednesday when we don't have practice?

HELGA: [Stuttering.] Uh, y-y-yeah. Sure!

ARNOLD: Are you alright, Helga?

HELGA: Yes, I'm alright, Arnoldo! Jeez, why do you keep asking?

ARNOLD: Well, I'm just making sure. You took a hard fall.

HELGA: Well, quit worrying about me! I'm fine. [They leave.]

SCENE: _Two days later, Helga is walking to Arnold's house. She stops by a brick wall in an alley. Some chalk marks remain on it, but nothing really can be seen on the wall._

HELGA: Alas, the wall where I wrote the words that have diverted his attention further away from me. Why did I go back and write Arnold Loves Lila instead of Helga? If I had left it alone, Arnold would be pining over me! [Sighs.] Oh, why? Why? [Hears breathing over her shoulder. She turns around and stares at Brainy.] Brainy, honestly. What's goin' on? Why are you always behind me?

BRAINY: Eh-heh… hehhh… I don't know.

HELGA: Well, then stop it!

BRAINY: Okay. [Starts walking away.]

HELGA: Oh, Brainy.

BRAINY: Yeah?

HELGA: [Punches him in the face.] We're done here. [Walks up to Arnold's door and knocks. Arnold answers.]

ARNOLD: Oh, hey. Come on upstairs. [Helga walks in. He follows Arnold up to his room and starts thinking to her self.]

HELGA: [Thinking.] _Finally, I'm invited inside of Arnold's house! This is the best day of my life!_

ARNOLD: Up here in the attic. [He pulls down the attic stairs.] Come on. I gotta go back down stairs, my book's in the kitchen. [Arnold leaves.]

HELGA: At last! I'm in my love's room without breaking into it to be here! Oh, I could just die! [Lays on his couch and sighs and starts daydreaming…]

SCENE: _Helga's dream. She's in a rowboat with Arnold in the middle of a lake at night Arnold's got this Don Juan look goin' on, Helga looks a lot like Scarlet from Gone With The Wind._

ARNOLD: Helga.

HELGA: Yes, Arnold?

ARNOLD: Well, I just wanted to tell you that it's been a year since our marriage in Nepal.

HELGA: And?

ARNOLD: And I think we should renew our vows.

HELGA: Oh, so soon?

ARNOLD: I just feel that I want to be with you forever, Helga. And I want to keep our love fresh and new for another year.

HELGA: But what about the year after that?

ARNOLD: We shall than too. And until the stars burn out and the world stops turning. I just want to make sure that I'll be with you forever. I don't know what I'd do without you.

HELGA: You don't need to know, for it will never happen. I too shall always love you.

ARNOLD: Oh, Helga. I don't know how I overlooked you all those years ago.

HELGA: The past is not important. Let's focus on the now…

ARNOLD: Yes, the now. The present. Oh, Helga. Helga…

SCENE: _Back to reality, Helga's on the couch and doesn't fully know of what Arnold's talkin' about. He's over her half-asleep body as she smiles in a dream until she wakes up and realizes it ain't what it seems. This could be a song if I wrote up the plans but right now, let's just focus on the story at hand…_

ARNOLD: Helga. Helga!

HELGA: [Sighs lovingly.] Yes, my l…

ARNOLD: Helga?

HELGA: [Finally wakes up.] Oh, Arnold! Um, I'm sorry. I must've zoned out right there. 

ARNOLD: Can we get to it?

HELGA: Oh, yeah, sure. What page do you want to do?

ARNOLD: [Flips through book.] How about Page 63?

SCENE: _Helga is sitting by herself at lunch. Phoebe hasn't shown up. She's sort of sulking, looking at her food, and making a circle on the table with her finger. Phoebe finally shows up._

PHOEBE: Hi, Helga.

HELGA: Oh, hi, Phoebe.

PHOEBE: What's wrong, Helga?

HELGA: [Sighs depressed.] Alright, Phoebe, I'm not going to lie to you. You know my secret.

PHOEBE: You mean…

HELGA: Yes, _that_ secret. I have to tell you, Phoebe, I'm sick of it. There's no point to it. I just keep setting myself up to be knocked down.

PHOEBE: So do you mean you're going to…

HELGA: Yes, that's exactly what I mean. I'm gonna tell him.

PHOEBE: Right now?

HELGA: No, not right now! Doi! Later. On the day of the play.

PHOEBE: Are you sure that's a good idea?

HELGA: When else am I going to be able? I'll tell him, right after the second act. I don't care what he has to say, I don't care about what anybody else has to say; I need to tell him. And I can't back out of it or cover it up. This needs to be done. I need you to help me.

PHOEBE: How can I help?

HELGA: Don't talk me out of it.

PHOEBE: [Holds Helga's hand.] Don't worry, I won't talk you out of it.

HELGA: You're my best friend Phoebe. Thank you.

PHOEBE: It's alright. When's the play?

HELGA: Next week.

SCENE: _In class. An educational filmstrip is playing. Not film, film_strip. _Some of you know the deal. It's like a slide show that wishes it was a real movie._

HELGA: [Writing but it's being spoken inside of her head.] '_Oh, love that I not dare speak, your face it fills my mind. / And the clock is nearly wearing down and it is almost time. / I hope for the best, the day I confess all these feelings for you / and my only guess that I don't need to suggest in saying you love me too.' _[She sighs lovingly. A few seats ahead of her, Arnold is taking notes on the filmstrip.]

ARNOLD: [Seems like he's taking notes, his pencil is scribbling sporadically, but every once in a while the word 'Helga' appears. Arnold doesn't notice because he's watching the filmstrip. Eventually every word he's writing Helga as they start to dominate his sentences. Arnold looks down at his paper.] What? [Notices all the 'Helga's.] Oh, no. Oh, please, no!

HELGA: Pipe down, football-head! I'm tryin' to watch the movie! Sheesh!

ONE WEEK LATER

SCENE: _Helga is dressed up for her role backstage behind the curtain. Arnold approaches her._

ARNOLD: So, are you scared?

HELGA: Me, scared? Never! I'm never afraid of anything, especially this stuff. Doi!

ARNOLD: Well, you know, it looks like there are more people out there than during the Romeo and Juliet play _or_ during any other play for that matter. You know, like the food groups one and the…

HELGA: I get the point! Big deal! They'll just forget about the whole thing tomorrow, and give us false compliments to make it seem they actually liked the play. It's hypocrisy at it's best.

ARNOLD: Well, whatever, Helga. The show's starting, I'd suggest you move away from the curtain before they open it.

HELGA: [Notices that she's standing right in the middle of the stage by the curtain and moves away from it. Arnold walks away. She gets into a corner behind the stage and starts doing that little romantic sigh she's always doin'. You know, "Ahhh-hh-hh-hh…" That one.] Oh, Arnold, so observant, so wise, so interested in my well being. I may not even be able to live to tell you how I feel about you at the second act for my heart might stop at your beauty. Oh… [Hears breathing behind her. Before she punches him, she talks calmly to him.] Brainy, who _are_ you in this play?

BRAINY: Eh… eh… Sam. Eh…

HELGA: Do you want to be seen on stage _WITH A BLACK EYE?!_

BRAINY: Uh… no.

HELGA: Then get… away… from me. [Brainy just steps off backwards into the darkness.]

SCENE: _Montage. On stage, Gerald is speaking for the opening of the play…_

GERALD: 'This play is called "Our Town". It was written by Thornton Wilder, produced and directed by Mr. Simmons. In it you will see the entire fourth grade class of P.S. 118. The name of the town…'

__

…Later into the play…

RHONDA: 'I declare, you got to speak to George. Seems like something's come over him lately. He's no help to me at all. I can't even get him to cut me some wood…'

__

Nadine puts a card on an easel that says Act II…

LORENZO: [Reading for Mr. Webb.] '…Don't you think that's probably it?'

ARNOLD: 'Ye-e-s. I never thought of that.'

LORENZO: 'A girl's apt to be a mite nervous on her wedding day.'

CURLY: [Runs on stage in costume with a bottle that says 'XXX' on it. He's maniacally laughing, running across the stage and then goes off the stage.]

SIMMONS: [Reading the script from the side of the stage.] Okay… that was interesting…

__

…At the wedding…

ARNOLD: '…I want to try. Emily, I'm going to do my best. I love you, Emily. I need you.'

HELGA: 'Well, if you love me, help me. All I want is someone to love me.'

ARNOLD: 'I will, Emily. Emily, I'll try.'

HELGA: 'And I mean for _ever_. Do you hear? For ever and ever.' [They fall into each other's arms. They walk up to the Clergyman who is Gerald, the Stage Manager.]

GERALD: 'Do you, George, take this woman, Emily, to be your wedded wife, to have…'

SHEENA: [As Mrs. Soames.] 'Perfectly Lovely wedding! Loveliest wedding I ever saw. Oh, I do love a good wedding, don't you? Doesn't she make a lovely bride?'

ARNOLD: 'I do.'

GERALD: 'Do you, Emily, take this man, George, to be your wedded husband,–

SHEENA: 'Don't know _when_ I've seen such a lovely wedding. But I always cry. Don't know why it is, but I always cry. I just like to see young people happy, don't you? Oh, I think it's lovely.' [Arnold gives Helga the ring and they kiss. Helga doesn't prolong it this time, but seems to really be enjoying it.]

GERALD: 'I've married over two hundred couples in my day. Do I believe in it? I don't know…'

SCENE:_ Backstage._

ARNOLD: You were great out there, Helga. Only one more act to go.

HELGA: [Very shyly.] Arnold, I have to tell you something.

ARNOLD: Oh, what's that.

HELGA: I love you. [Arnold freezes in his spot.]

ARNOLD: Um, Helga, did you just say… [Helga puts her head down but is looking up at Arnold.] Are you sure that you… _love_ me? This isn't like the last time you told me this, is it?

HELGA: [Very mellow.] Arnold, I've loved you since the first day I met you. Before we were even in elementary school! I haven't been able to stop thinking about you! I wrote all those poems about you a long time ago, I'm the one who wrote _Arnold loves Lila_ after I had erased my own name, and _I_ was the owner of the parrot who recited one of my many poems about you. I've been crazy over you for five years now! I know I haven't really shown it to you or anybody, but it's just that… you know… I can't help it. I love you, Arnold, and I need to know how you feel. I had to be honest with you and now you need to be honest with me. Do you love me? [Arnold looks at Helga wide-eyed.] Do you _love_ me?

ARNOLD: Helga, we're only nine! I mean how do you even know if you're in love?

HELGA: I _am_, Arnold! _I_ am, and I need to know if you are to. [She's starting to cry.] Do you _love me?!_

ARNOLD: [Pauses for a minute. Helga starts to walk away, crying heavily.] Helga! Wait!

HELGA: I understand, Arnold. I can't expect you to…

ARNOLD: Helga, I love you.

HELGA: [Sniffs and looks up.] What?

ARNOLD: Mostly just recently. I've liked you for a while, but not as you liked me. I've noticed the different sides of you from time to time. I know you haven't hated me, but I didn't expect _this!_ [Helga starts to smile.] Helga, just recently I've noticed Helga the Person, and I've started to think that maybe I loved you but now I'm sure. But what now, Helga? We love each other but we're only nine! What do we do now? Telling me isn't going to do much.

HELGA: Oh, shut up. [She runs and hugs him. Then proceeds to kiss him.] I don't care what happens next! Just as long as I know you love me! [All the other cast members walk back stage.]

SIMMONS: [Walks back there with them.] Alright, class! Act Three is coming up! I want all of you to go give me a special performance. [Everyone finally notices Arnold and Helga. She's still hugging him.]

ARNOLD: You heard, Mr. Simmons. Act Three is coming up!

HELGA: Arnold…

ARNOLD: [Whispering to Helga.] Look; let's just finish the play. We'll figure the rest of this out later.

HELGA: [Beginning to cry.] You're ashamed, aren't you?

ARNOLD: No, I… [Helga runs off crying.]

SIMMONS: Um, I think we should all just get ready for the next act. [Simmons leaves.]

GERALD: What was _that_ all about, Arnold?

HAROLD: Yeah, why was Helga hugging you? [Arnold stays quiet. Everyone finally realizes what's goin' on.] Awwwwww, Arnold and Helga sitting in a tree…

ARNOLD: _HEY!_ [Harold shuts up.] _DON'T YOU TALK ABOUT US LIKE THAT!_ [Silence fills the air.] I like her, she likes me. If you can't handle that, I don't care. If you can handle that, shut up about it! [Arnold stomps away.]

GERALD: Wow, I don't think I've ever seen Arnold that angry.

LILA: Oh, him and Helga are ever so cute!

ARNOLD: [Runs to Helga.] I'm sorry, Helga. I love you to. I don't care what the other people think.

HELGA: [Stops crying.] Well, we still need to finish the play. So you think this will effect it?

ARNOLD: Yeah, but I think it'll only help. [They walk off.]

SCENE: _At the end of the play._

HELGA: 'Mother Gibbs?'

RHONDA: 'Yes, Emily?'

HELGA: 'They don't understand, do they?'

RHONDA: 'No dear they don't understand.' [Gerald steps out and a clock bell is heard.]

GERALD: 'Most everybody's asleep in Grover's Corners. There are a few lights on: Shorty Hawkins, down at the depot, has just watched the Albany train go by. And at the livery stable somebody's setting up late and talking. – Yes, it's clearing up. There are the stars – doing their old, old crisscross journeys in the sky. Scholars haven't settled the matter yet, but they seem to think there are no living beings up there. Just chalk… or fire. Only this one is straining away, straining away all the time to make something of itself. The strain's so bad that every sixteen hours everybody lies down and gets a rest. [Winds his watch.] Hm… Eleven o'clock in Grover's Corners. – You get a good rest, too. Good night.' [The curtain falls and the audience applauds. The curtain lifts back up and everyone takes final bows. During the bows, a loud beeping noise is heard through the auditorium. Everyone is looking around to find out where the noise is coming from…]

SCENE: _Helga wakes up in her room to the beeping of her digital alarm clock. She wakes up with a smile but then realizes it was a dream, and suddenly gets a little depressed. She takes a look at her dresser. There are some papers that say "Book Report" on top and also a copy of the book "Our Town" on her dresser. She gets dressed, takes the book and paper, and puts them in her backpack. She leaves her house with her backpack and lunchbox and boards the bus. She sees Arnold._

ARNOLD: [Leans up behind Helga's seat.] So, what did you read for your book report, Helga?

HELGA: None of your beeswax, Arnoldo! [Arnold sits back down insulted. Helga gives a defeated sigh.] Here! [She hands him the book.]

ARNOLD: "Our Town." Is it any good?

HELGA: Eh, it's kind of boring at times. A lot of talking. And it's also a play so it's written like a script.

ARNOLD: Wow, that must've been kind of weird reading.

HELGA: Yeah, but you get used to it. [Arnold hands the book back.]

ARNOLD: Hmm, as long as you had a good time reading it.

HELGA: Hey, what do _you_ care anyway?

ARNOLD: I'm just trying to be nice, Helga.

HELGA: Well, stop it all ready!

ARNOLD: Okay… [Starts talking to Gerald.] Man, what's _her_ problem?

GERALD: Eh, she probably just had a bad morning…

HELGA: [Sinks low in the seat and sighs romantically.] Oh, Arnold…

ARNOLD: [Peaks over the seat.] Yeah?

HELGA: [Screams and the bus swerves.] Get away from me!

ARNOLD: I thought I heard you say my name…

HELGA: Well, I didn't, so get over it.

FINISH: _Arnold sits back in his seat, Helga stoops low in hers again and sighs. The bus takes them off to school for another day of mental torture inside of Helga's mind. Will she ever confess? Will Arnold ever see through her? Eh, maybe. Until then, you should read Thornton Wilder's classic play _Our Town_. You'll probably have a better understanding of the story after this. After all the more you read… THE SMARTER YOU ARE! YEAH! Hm… Eleven o'clock in Leonard, Michigan. – You get a good rest, too. Good night._

****

THE END

All rights reserved. ©Shaun Blankenship. Used with permission.


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